Temporary Troubles, Eternal Glory

"For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever!

So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever." 

2 Cor 4: 17-18 (NLT)

Memory Gallery

DigiPen Semester 1 is over!

Work. Snack. Youtube.

Math homework left by dropouts.

Lectures were half as full towards the end of the semester.

Thor!
Amazing sculpture done by an artist from my school.

Another artist dude drew this.

Candlelight. 

Our souls ignite, like constellations of light.

In the darkest night, the fires of hearts burn bright.

All specs!

Beautiful morning. Gotta love Punggol scenery.

Heart-shaped cloud.

It was only much later after taking the picture that I discovered the heart shape =)

Honeystars madness!

Josiah came home with these humongous sacks of starry sweetness.

What up now, cereal guy?

The Final Lap

5 Exams and Mission 1 is over!
Mission 2 will start in 3 weeks time, but that's a different story.

I feel a great deal lighter after last Friday; all assignments and projects submitted!
The biggest of which is the Game Project: 2 months of hard work!
Bryan and I practically worked till 2am almost every day on it.
We would camp overnight at his place every Thursday.
And finally, it is finished.

Do me a favor, play my game!
Drop me a message or something, and I'll pass it to you :)

The game: Swarm

In Swarm, you play as a alien monster fish that controls a hive of tiny minions, known as Swarmlings.
Much like a queen bee with her colony of bees, except in the seas.

Order your Swarmlings to attack marine life, while dodging their assaults.

The game features 3 different kind of Swarmlings, each with unique abilities.

Some will charge towards your enemies and devour them like Piranhas.

Others shoot bolts of energy from a safe distance.

Customize your ideal army with a combination of the 3.

Battle 7 different sea creatures! And Epic Bosses!

Many people found the game addictive - students, teachers, and friends!

Hexing addicted to the game

All glory to God.

The journey was rough; there were days when I was losing it because of the physical tiredness, mental stress, and emotional weariness. I made plenty of mistakes - missed out on instructions, not submitting assignments properly, late for classes. Yet God helped me out. Friends will stop me from submitting wrongly and let me know what to submit. Lecturers would be gracious to let me submit later, or take a quiz that I missed.

It was God that helped me through my tests and papers - there were not a few papers when I got perfect/near perfect grade, which I knew I was not capable of. There was one paper which I was doing it wrongly. At the last few minutes of the test, someone asked my lecturer about the  requirements of the paper, and I realized my mistake. Because of that, I rushed through to change my essay and wrote a ton of crap. I was shocked to get 98/100. God must have blinded his eyes.

There must have been a dozen of such instances.

It must be the grace of God.

Alright I gotta go sleep now, C Programming Exam coming up later!
God's grace is upon me to do well!

Wake up and smile :)

There's this song from Owl City that speaks to me. Here's the last stanza:

This Is The Future by Owl City
And when you wake up on your own
Look around you 'cause you're not alone
Let your hopes go and they'll survive
'Cause this is the future and you are alive
You're headed home

Translation by Israel Chua
Wake up, wake up! Snap out of it! 

People around you experience hardships too, some worse than yours.
Be loving, care for those around you. Don't be stuck in your own world of selfishness. 

Let go, let God. Every seed that dies produces much fruit.
Thank God that you have a glorious future and destiny ahead! 

Thank God that you are alive!

Scenic Sublime

Yes, I've been listening to Owl City again.
There's one exceptionally beautiful phrase in the song Fuzzy Blue Lights that I absolutely love: Scenic Sublime.

Man, how does the guy come up with such illustrative lyrics?

And this morning's weather most aptly portrays that phrase!

Melody meets Picturesque - the epitome of beauty.

Level Up!

Woohoo! Thank God for good grades :)
Math Quiz 5: 40/40!
C Programming Quiz 4: 15/16
English Test: 16/20!!

English Test was a pleasant surprise, because my friends around me were getting 12/20 and there were rumours that 90% of the cohort failed the test. Bryan, whose English is better than mine, also scored 12/20. I must have been one of the better few XD

My teacher commended me for writing in a coherent flow and using simple words. That really made my day!

Man I love my English teacher - she makes the art of critical reading and writing come alive (although the essays she asks us to read are largely unpleasant and grim).

And 1st time full marks for Math! Woohoo! Thank You Jesus.

---------------------------------------

The father of a friend of mine had recently been hospitalized; he had fallen from the 2nd storey of a building. As the architect, he was doing inspections in the darkness of the night when he walked through a window, expecting to lean on a glass barrier. The window pane had been removed for repairs or examination, but the supervisors did not inform him, nor did they place any warning signals. Thus, he unknowingly walked off the edge, to gain a broken leg and fractures on the spine.

However, there was no hint of bitterness or anger as he narrated the mishap. Instead, he thanked the Lord for showing how much He loved him. Disregarding the intention of suing the responsible (or irresponsible) parties, he shared of his gratefulness to God that He had protected him. Doctors had expected far worse fractures on his spine. He is still able to walk. He would recover in two months.

In his unfortunate state, and not to mention the sky-high medical bills, he had every reason to complain. The amazing thing was that he was happy. Genuinely.

That really inspired me: I can choose to be happy. I am no way in a worse condition than he is - not even close. There is every reason to rejoice.

And the key is gratefulness to God.

Thank You Jesus, for finding me 10 years ago, as a lonely primary 6 boy rejected by many. Thank You for guiding me through my education, from Sec to Poly and now at DigiPen. Thank You, Father, that You know me inside out, that You know what is best for me. I thank You for the lessons You have taught me, however painful they may have been.

All things will work out for good to those who love God :)

4 Weeks in DigiPen: Getting Better

MAT 140: Linear Algebra and Geometry
    Quiz 1: 14/40    =(
    Quiz 2: 14/40    T.T
    Quiz 3: 35/40!   =D

Woot! Thank God that the 3rd quiz was much easier, and that He helped me avoid 3 careless mistakes!

The past week had 4 quizzes and 5 assignment deadlines! WooHooo!! (yeah I'm going bonkers)
Managed to finish all assignments, and generally performed well in all the quizzes!

We have one module, Project Introduction, that is about making a game.
This week, Bryan and I pitched our game idea. The presentation went well! I think we were one of the best few teams that presented! Thank God for helping me speak; public speaking scares the crap outta me. I was literally trembling when the presentation was over.

We're gonna make a simple game, where you play as a underwater creature that can spawn swarms of plankton-like minions to consume all aquatic life. We call the game "Swarm". When it's almost done, we hope to let as many people try out our game and give us feedback!

Thank God that this is a week of victory!

2 weeks later will be a crazy week. Mid-Terms! +Assignment Deadlines for at least 4 modules!
+1st Milestone Presentation for our game! This means that the game must be playable, without the art and sound, in 2 weeks!

----------------------------------------------------

This week's service was incredible! Haven't felt God's love and presence in such a tangible way for a long time! I realized that for this season, the number 1 person in my life had been Yours Truly. May His grace always help me make Him my first love!

"We love Him because He first loved us."

- 1 John 4:19 -

2 Weeks in Digipen: Prelude to Hell

Overconfidence. Math has never been a big issue for me. A 20min quiz on Coordinate Systems seemed easy enough. I've done my homework - there was no need to study for a simple quiz. But when I came face to face with my underestimated foe, all I could do was to stare helplessly at it for 10 minutes.

Nervously I pulled out the formulas from my memory and proceeded to attack the enemy. But unlike the tests of our Singaporean education system, the question (yes, there was only 1 question with 5 sub-questions) could not be solved with memorized formulas; one needed a deep understanding of the topic. I completed 75% of the quiz, only to realize I got it all wrong from the start. I re-did the question, but again I realized it was still wrong. That can't be good.

But I wasn't the only screwed one. Like a reaper hovering over a field of ripe wheat, the quiz swung its deadly scythe, slicing off the heads of the great majority.

I have never failed math IN MY LIFE. Much less a Super Fail.

Super F!

After this massacre, the whole class became instantly motivated. Flocks will gather around the Math Teaching Assistants to hear them preach after class. For 4 hours. I myself will strive for at least an A-.

Life is becoming more hectic as the days pass, and the days pass exceptionally fast. My new-found friend, Gavin, and I stayed back in school until 11.15pm yesterday to complete our assignments. And its hardly the peak period yet.

But as my psychology professor puts it, "It's hell, but it's enjoyable hell."

I love my modules! From Composition to C Programming, I am passionate about them all. My favourite of all is Psychology. My psychology professor is so hilarious and interesting, and his lessons are very, VERY practical. He teaches us about interacting with people with different personalities, self-development and motivation, and simply being happy. It's just so awesome, I gotta share more about it in another post =)

I always feared that a lazy and irresponsible person such as myself can't survive in DigiPen. By God's grace (and His divine rotan), my flesh is put in check. I need more of His grace; I feel I have been relying too much on my own planning and intelligence.

And I need to play more games! One can't make fun games if he doesn't play them.

But for now, sleep is imperative. Snooze out.

DigiPen Begins

My long awaited and dreaded moment has finally arrived.
I am a freshman of DigiPen.

Time really races rapidly. ORD is just 10 days away. Yeah, I'm not that excited about it =P

The highly acclaimed college for Games creating is prestigious, yes, but for a reason. The students are placed under high academic pressure, of which I have heard many horror stories. I am excited yet apprehensive...

70/100 = C- or 1.7 GPA
93/100 = A or 4.0 GPA

And there is no bell curve. If everyone does badly and fails, everyone DOES fail. But on the bright side, it means that everyone can get A's too. This sort of encourages cooperation between students, rather than selfish competition, so I'm quite happy for that =)

In any case, I am determined to do well, for the sake of my future, my family. I want to be more than financially capable of supporting my future family as well as my mother. I want to live out the dream of creating successful games. I want to glorify God.

My first lesson on monday will be Maths. Said to be the toughest module for Sem 1. Woot.

Anyway, I was at the orientation on Friday, and was surprised to see soooo many familiar faces. There were a huge lot of us from NYP lawls!

The Harrowing Winter

While there are many reasons to rejoice, like we moving to Suntec, and the many blessings that are included into the "Memorial" page of my blog, this year has been a tough one. And perhaps the toughest one yet.

Last year, I went through a humiliatingly painful experience, through which God taught me faithfulness and discipline. God helped me to be more discipline (more is the keyword, I still lack discipline :X), I believe because He has a great destiny for my life, which requires me to be a disciplined man of God. Thank God that He chastises me, because He loves me.

"My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, Nor detest His correction;
For whom the Lord loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights."
Pro 3:11-12

This year had 2 equally, if not more, painful experiences. But they were not about discipline, but about decisiveness and pride. Maybe I don't learn except by these experiences. Nonetheless, God is good :) I am His son, He loves me, therefore He chastises me. And He has blessed me abundantly, like being accepted into DigiPen, schools fees cut by 66% because of the 2 Year Degree Programme, my awesome new phone, different Job offers, privilege to play for WR Zone, different CGs, LiveJam, etc. 

But all these material blessings and ministry opportunities mean nothing, and I mean NOTHING compared to relationships. I thank God for my dearest friends, who been with me during my tough times, and constantly bring joy and life. I thank God for my family, especially my mother; I thank Him that I've grown a little closer with my family.

Truly when you are have lost everything else, you realize that family and friends are all that matters. And without a shadow of doubt, God my Father matters most. I can afford to lose anything and anyone but Him. To hear His voice and to feel His presence, is more than enough.

So its been a bad year for me, but I'm not the only one. So many of my friends had their tough times, some much worse then I. You could be one of them. Let us stay united despite the troubles; let not the evil one take opportunity to divide us. No matter the differences and hurts, the love of Christ is more than enough. Always pray for one another (trust me, your own pain will feel better when your pray for others), and let the love of God be shared abroad in our hearts through the Holy Ghost.

Through the cold and harsh winter, let us become stronger, more mature, and more united.

Look out, for spring awaits! :)

"Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." (Heb 12:11)

Moo.

Jeremy Lee introduced this epi-tarded song :D

I am Cow!!!! by Arrogant Worms
I am Cow, hear me moo
I weigh twice as much as you
And I look good on the barbecue
Yogurt, curd, cream, cheese and butter's
Made from liquid from my udders
I am Cow, I am Cow, hear me moo

I am Cow, eating grass
Methane gas comes out my ass
And out my muzzle when I belch
O, the ozone layer is thinner
From the outcome of my dinner
I am Cow, I am Cow, I've got gas

I am Cow, here I stand
Far and wide upon this land
And I am living everywhere
From B.C. to Newfoundland
You can squeeze my teats by hand
I am Cow, I am Cow, I am Cow
I am Cow, I am Cow, I am Cow!

Joy

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law."(Gal 5:22-23)

Are you feeling joyful?

The Holy Spirit brings JOY. If you are not happy, you are not in the will of God. Be happy!

2 causes of unhappiness:
1) Unfavorable Circumstances: "My life sucks!"
2) Pity Partying: "My life sucks. I choose to be unhappy and I'm telling the world on Facebook and Twitter so that you can pity me. So quick, start pitying! Me!"

Okay jokes aside...

Recently, I've been unhappy, fearful and stressed about stuff in my life. But if the fruit of the Spirit is Joy and Peace, I should be confident about my situation, that everything's not just gonna be alright, but gonna be GREAT. Because God is on my side, and He has come to give life, and life more abundantly!

If you know that you can't do it, good! Because His strength is made perfect in your weakness. You are going to find yourself doing things that you were never good at. You will conquer the your greatest fears. It is because of who you are in Christ.

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us," (Eph 3:20, NIV)

"But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me was not in vain; but I labored more abundantly than they all, yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me." (1 Cor 15:10)

By the grace/power of God, you can overcome all weakness, all trials, all temptations, all fears, all failures, all sickness, etc

But its not psycho-ing yourself to be happy. Talk to God. Tell Him about your frustrations. Ask Him for His grace to overcome. Then believe, even when you doubt. Just a small mustard seed of faith, even if mixed with fear, can cause you to walk on water in the midst of a storm, just like Peter.

All glory to God!

Final Day Reporting For NS!

TODAY IS THE LAST DAY AT DESIGN PROGIDY! LAST DAY REPORTING FOR NS! :D

Talk about Happy National Day!!! ORD LOH!! (well almost... officially ORD on 14 Sept)

Spent the day monitoring NDP Website, uploading hundreds of NDP photos to Flickr, and playing L4D2 =X
Bryan and I treated to 2 younger members of the Website Team to lunch at a Dim Sum Restaurant :)
Sort of a tradition for the ORD personnel.

After today, a new and glorious phase of my life shall commence!

Just registered for all my modules for my 1st Semester at DigiPen, they look exciting :) Kinda stress about it though; hope that I can manage my time well in DigiPen. From now till the start of school, I'm gonna focus on the game project I'm working on. Gotta rush it finish, otherwise I won't have time when school starts!

Relying on the grace of God!

Phew!

I'm a completionistic perfectionist with obsessive compulsive disorder! Spent hours and days organising my contacts! If a contact is from my secondary school, I would prefix the name with a 'OP', meaning Orchid Park. If a contact is from the cellgroup, I will prefix the name with a 'CG'. And I have 15 categories and almost 400 contacts, so there you have it.

But now I'm frustrated with my WhatsApp not showing my contacts and my Contacts showing too many contacts. And I'm searching for the best calendar app out there. It must work perfectly!!!

Sony Xperia PLAY!

My Razer Abyssus mouse wheel suddenly stop working! There was a 'click' sound and it became loose :( I think I still have warranty though.

On the much brighter side of life, my mum came to me one day asked me if I wanted a new phone. She bought a Mio package for our new house broadband, and the Singtel guys threw in a Sony Xperia Play. It sort of rang a bell in my mind, but I didn't know what it was, or how good the phone was.

Later I found out that its reeaallly good Andriod phone! More than that, it's the Playstation Phone for crying out loud! =D

Music, Games, Social Media, Touch Screen and a Funky Gamepad? Whatchu know about Smartphones?

Check this video out:

Man that mechanism feels tight! LOL

I'm still configuring the phone and getting used to it. Have yet to transfer the 300 plus contacts over to the new number, so I'll be using my old phone for quite a while.

Thank God for this new awesome phone! I didn't even ask for it. All I wanted was an iPhone, Samsung Galaxy S or something similar. Well this is it, with a Playstation gamepad chucked into it underbelly. God is good!

Sony Xperia PLAY. Smart.

Aftermath

I just want to start by saying it's amazing how God turned many of my friends' lives around.

Some grew up in dysfunctional families and abusive parents.
Some went through financial crises.
Some were hated by their very own parents.
Some have their parents divorced.
Some lost their parents prematurely, to illness, misfortune or suicide.
Some had a chronic illness like cancer.
Many lived a meaningless and purposeless life.
Many searched for acceptance and love in the wrong places.

They struggled with low self-esteem, depression, bitterness and emptiness.
But God came and changed their lives. They've become confident. They've forgiven those who hurt them deeply. They now have a new meaning and joy in their lives.

Lifted out of the ashes, we've found hope in the aftermath.

-----------------------------------

This lyrics of the song is full of meaning, and I'll like to share it's meaning with you guys.

The song is artistically composed of 3 progressive stages:
1) God came to the rescue
2) God is with me right now
3) I give Him my life for what He's done

Part 1: God Came To The Rescue
The author looks back at his own life, at how God rescued him from a mess, just like many of us. The author had a tough and messed up life - a nobody. And looking back, he is amazed that God, creator of all, would come down to earth as a Man, and die for someone like him. In the aftermath of Jesus' death, the author found comfort, love and hope for a new life.

The skies lay low where You are, on the earth You rest Your feet.

Jesus is exalted above the highest heavens, and the earth is His footstool.
"...Heaven is My throne, and earth is My footstool...." (Isa 66:1)

Yet He came down to earth for you and I.

Yet the hands that cradle the stars are the hands that bled for me.

The hands that hold the stars in place are the same hands that were nailed on the cross.

In that moment of glorious surrender

You were broken for all the world to see

Lifted out of the ashes, I am found in the aftermath

In that glorious moment on the Cross, He was broken for the broken.

Freedom found in Your scars, by Your grace my life redeemed

Yet You chose to take the sinner's crown, as You placed Your crown on me

The Beautiful Exchange: All our pain and shame (the sinner's crown of thorns) for all of His comfort and glory (His own crown)

In that moment of glorious surrender

Was the moment You broke the chains in me

Lifted out of the ashes, I am found in the aftermath

Because of His death, all sin, bad habits, sickness, poverty and rejection has been broken.
We are free.

And in that moment You opened up the heavens

To the broken, the beggar and the thief

Lifted out of the wreckage, I found hope in the aftermath

The heavens is not only opened to the broken, the beggar and the suffering, but also to the thief, the criminal and the sinner. Amazing grace.


Part 2: God is with me right now

And I know You're with me

Yes I know You're with me here

And I know Your love will light the way

Even in my most difficult times, when it feels like I'm facing it alone, I KNOW that Jesus is with me, and His love will make a way.

Part 3: I give Him my life for what He's done

Now all I have I count it all as lost

But to know You and to carry the cross

Knowing I'm found in the light of the aftermath

Because You gave your all for me, I now give my all for You.
All I want is to know You and to follow You.

Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ...that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death... - Phil 3:8, 10

Retarded T-Shirts!

I was browsing the virtual retail stores on the interwebs, and stumbled upon these hilarious and witty T-shirt designs at bustedtees.com! I literally Laughed Out Loud!

Enjoy this tumblr-wannabe post! :D

"Ludwig van Beethoven died in 1827 of liver disease. True."

MY FAVORITE! HAHAHA

 "Depression, as currently defined by the American Psychological Association Journal, can be traced back to this specific situation."

 "We were going to sell a Taylor Swift shirt, but he cut us off."

"In brightest day, in blackest night, always obey traffic lantern’s light."

LMAO indeed!!

Jayesslee - Angelic

If I were to describe Janice and Sonia in one word, it would be Angelic.

Their voices are so anointed! As they sung and shared their testimony, I was soaked in the love and presence of God, even hours after the service. I felt peace and comfort for the worries I have for my life, knowing that God is holding my life in His hands.

I was reminded of how He first reached out to me 10 years ago in Primary 6, and carried me through my troubled years in Sec 1 & 2.

You can watch them here:

and on Sunday:

Their testimony also reminded me that life is short, that some things that are very attractive in this life are temporal. Things like popularity, recognition, good looks. But relationships, love, character and good works last forever. Sometimes we've gotta step out and do things that matter for the long term, and for eternity, even if we are afraid.

Sonia rocks! Pretty + anointed + great singing + plays guitar + really loves God = Awesome!
Janice is awesome too, but Sonia is cuter haha.

But to be honest, I don't have a crush on either of them.

Anyway...

Been busy lately, cause NDP is coming soon, so there's more things to do in the office. Also spent quite a bit of time with Live Jam videos and stuff. Glad I'm done with the videos! Gotta spend more time on my freelance job this week; I have been neglecting it due to the hectic schedule. Need to rest in the grace of God!

Take Heart

You're gonna make it. It's gonna be okay. It's gonna be better than ever. Take heart!

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
- John 16:33

Peak Season! + Muse on Indecisiveness

Super super super busy! So many things to do, not sure what to do first! I think I spend too much time worrying and deciding what to do haha.

Indecisiveness. Something that many struggle with, including myself. I've been thinking recently, what is the root of indecisiveness? I'm not talking about making hard and important decisions, cos those need to be well-thought out. I'm talking about day-to-day choices like "Where should we eat?", "Should I meet my friends or do projects at home?" and "Which shirt should I buy?"

After much introspection, this what I found out:

Perfectionism -> Indecisiveness

The consuming need to be always right. The need to be perfect. The inner voice that says "I cannot and must not make mistakes." Kiasu-ism. When presented with choices, the perfectionist is compelled to analyse every option with great thought in order to get the best deal. He is always concerned about "what if I miss out? what if this really better?"

Many times, he is in inner conflict between 2 ideals, e.g. choosing between "best quality" and "saving money" or between pleasing a friend or a parent.

But more than making the right choice, the perfectionist want to be right before others. Which lead us to...

Fear of Failure -> Perfectionism

Somewhere in the deep recesses of his heart, the indecisive perfectionist hears a subtle voice telling him that he is a failure. A voice he constantly denies. As a defense mechanism against the thought of being a failure, he is resolved never to make wrong choices, no matter how trivial they are. Which takes us deeper...

Low Self-Esteem -> Fear of Failure

Due a poor image of himself, the indecisive perfectionist fears to be labelled a failure. He takes criticism very harshly, and repeatedly blames himself for mistakes. Thus, in the core decision-making center of his heart, he must make perfect decisions to protect himself from criticism. Which brings us to...

Lack of Affirmation -> Low Self-Esteem

The indecisive perfectionist who fears failure and has a poor self-image, or the "poor guy" to be concise, has a unsatisfied need for approval. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, every human has a need to feel accepted and belonged. A lack of affirmation from others, especially from parents, can cause one to spiral down to low self-esteem. Some would swing to the other extreme of overconfidence and arrogance, but that's a different topic.

So there we have it:

Lack of Affirmation -> Low Self-Esteem -> Fear of Failure -> Perfectionism -> Indecisiveness

The root of indecisiveness is the lack of affirmation.

So we know the root problem, now what?
I am NOT insisting that we should start praising and encouraging indecisive people all the time. Of course affirming them when they make right choices would definitely help. But ultimately overcoming indecisiveness is an individual decision (paradoxical..).

But how? It is possible with human effort. Believe in yourself! Start saying "I am a decisive person" and believe in that! Share your problems with understanding and affirming people, and don't be too hard for yourself when you make mistakes - laugh it off.

But there's an even better way,

Look to God, our Father.
It is only natural that we have a need for approval and affirmation. But if we focus on searching for affirmation in others, we'll be disappointed. And sometimes, our parents disappoint us. However, God will never disappoint us.

God accepts you just the way you are.
God approves of you.
God always affirms you.
God believe that you can do it!
God understands you.
God is proud of the good things you've done for Him.
God loves you.

I hope this helped you, or at least helped you to be understanding towards indecisive people!

lol I meant to do this blog post to talk about my busy life, but woooahhh.. what the hell?
Sorry for the anti-climax :P

Jayesslee!

I've just heard a wonderful piece of news!!!!
But before I let you know what it is...

I take back what I said about playing with more variation and flow.
Sonia plays better than I do! (I think I can play as well as she does :P)
Check this out:

Ah!!! Feel like learning this song to prove that I can play it as well :X

But yeah, I gotta admit... she's better. And she can do all that funky plucking while singing with an awesome voice.

More than just amazing voices, Janice and Sonia have a heart for God. From what I observe, their hearts/intentions are pure. And man, they play music and sing with anointing. Not to mention pretty.

That's why I'm excited to say that...
Jayesslee are coming to our church this year! :D


Weiren tells me that their testimony of how Jesus changed their lives is wonderful.

IT'S GONNA BE SO PHENOMENAL.

lol this is so awesomely timely! I heard Jayesslee 2 years ago, but I started to really listen to them only like 2 days back, and now they're coming! Pretty soon! May many lives be impacted, and may Jesus alone be glorified!

You Are My Strength by JS

When I first heard Janice and Sonia sing this song, I almost teared.

Anointed.

On a side note, Sonia's playing style is very similar to mine :D

Except that I throw in plucking and more variation; more flow. #pride

But she makes less mistakes than I do haha.

Actually there's loads of people who play the same style - the "cheating" open chords style for the key of E (Sonia is playing it in this video). Easy to play, and sounds like wow. That makes E one of my favourite keys :)

That's all I have to say now, may be doing a post about the song Aftermath soon.
See you! Love Jayesslee!

LIGHTS + NDP11 Website Launch

Just yesterday, I got an MSN msg from a NS friend that said "Hey Owl City fan, check this song out: "

A song about the frustrations of a misunderstood person,

who wishes that she could express herself better

Oh by the way, my friend was sitting like 4 metres away from me.

Wow, LIGHTS = Owl City - dreamy lyrics + gamer fantasy! I like Owl City's dreamy lyrics, but her lyrics are pretty good too. They speak to the heart.

Here's another 2 of her awesome songs:

1) Saviour (in my playlist)
2) My Boots <-- Awesome song with cool typography video!

National Day Parade 2011 Official Website is launching in a moment's time!
Woot, stayed overnight with mah peeps in the office to ensure the website can smoothly transit from the countdown to the actual website :)

Can't wait to get home and wash up! Didn't bathe/brush teeth for a day! Woke up on the office floor with my face oilier than the fried kuay tiao I ate last night :/

Do check out the website!

Blog Elections

Got some extra time today, so I've decided to some maintenance ;-)

In conjunction with the recent General Elections, I have elected a new list of blog links on the "Fellow Knights" sidebar!

If your blog link is missing, it's not because I don't love you anymore!
I still love you, just that your blog is either dead or I don't have permission to access it :(

So if you're reviving your blog, or suddenly decide to give me permission to read your blog (because I'm such an awesomely nice guy), do let me know! I'll gladly give you a seat in this Parliament.

New candidates are welcomed too!

I've finally completed the "The Knight" page, so you might want to take a look if you're bored and stuff.


I went through all the blog links to find out which candidates were worthy of election, and I found this picture on Katy's blog:

The most awesome line in The Saltwater Room,

Owl City's finest song!

Tumblr is pretty cool with the image sharing and stuff! I am always delighted to see those funny, cute and interesting images, esp from Wanyi's blog. I considered shifting to tumblr before, but unless there's an easy way to migrate all my posts, images and crap, I think I'm staying put.

Oh, and it's so awesomely cool to have a Thorian government: 6 mjolnirs and 81 lightning bolts! PAP in power + a sizable opposition to be the people's voice = a progressive Singapore. It's just sad that George Yeo have to go!!! T.T

Okay, I'm getting out of point, so I'll just end here. Till then!

3 Truths

It's one thing to know a truth. It's another to have experienced it yourself.

Recently, I've experienced 3 truths:

1) "You don't really know what you've got 'til it's gone."

Mike Shinoda got this right when he rapped the song Where'd You Go (Fort Minor).

What can't you afford to lose if you lost everything else?
What can you afford to give away to retain those that really matter?

2) Pain gives birth to maturity.

It increases our pain threshold, our capacity to handle things.

3) God always has a beautiful ending.

This thought came to me yesterday, 

"If you could see the Lord's intended outcome, you would rejoice."

Just like how He blessed Job after his crisis, He will do so for us.

We have every reason to rejoice.

"Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord--that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful." (James 5:11)

A New Year, A New Day

128 emails from Facebook on the 10th of April! Astronomical! Almost like the 1,900,000 dislikes on the Friday MV!

Thanks everyone for all your well wishes, on Facebook or otherwise! Appreciate every single thoughtful word! :)

It was really nice of the whole CG to sing me a birthday song at JTown Cafe, albeit embarrassing and spontaneous. I didn't expect so many people to make my day! I simply wanted to claim a free cake to share with Jeremy Goh haha.

To W406: I really love the presents, thanks so much!!!! Thanks Enyun, Zoe, Adeline and Hexing for picking out such nice clothes (I don't have much fashion sense)!

I really thank God for all of you for celebrating my birthday, and for His goodness towards me. He gave me the chance to work on another game project, after the previous one ceased a couple of weeks back. Praise God! I thank God for such a generous, honest, helpful and genuine friend like Bryan Dismas Yeo! He introduced me to the job, and was willing the cut down on his salary for my sake. Like wow.

Also I thank God for the work He is doing within me. I will be a better person by the end of this year! :)

A wish I made was for God to continually revive my heart, the hearts of W406, WR, and CHC. May His will be done. Revival is here!

Thanks for an awesome 22nd birthday!

Anyway, the beautiful song currently on my playlist is a new remix of an old hymn by Owl City! There are very few songs in the world which lyrics express my thoughts in every single line. This song is one of them:

How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
And make a wretch His treasure 

How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory 

Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice,
Call out among the scoffers 

It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished 

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection 

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom

Ciao!

2011: Promotion and Multiplication!

Some months back, Dr. Niko prophesied that 2011 will be a year of Promotion and Multiplication for our church. Thanks be to Weiren for reminding us about that!

Not going to let the evil one steal the word this year.
Not sure if I shared this before but I'll just share it anyway. Last year in October, I felt God showing me that City Harvest Church will grow and expand so rapidly that we will be amazed. He said "Be ready in season and out of season! You and your companions will contain the growth if you will prepare yourselves!"

In other words, some of us, including myself, will rise up to be shepherds, because of the growth. I didn't think of correlating this word with Dr. Niko's prophesy until this week. But of course the promise is conditional; I gotta prepare myself. I wondered, in what way can I prepare myself? Just like what Weiren preached today, one way is to study the Word!

It's such an amazing revelation that the Logos is Jesus Christ! We've heard that Jesus is the living Word, but somehow, this is like some new revelation. It must be realizing that Logos is not just the written word, but God Himself. Cool.

Anyways, one reason why I blog is to keep a written record about the events of my life, my thoughts, feelings and funny crap. Those archives proved to be darn useful. Especially when you apply for scholarships (which I currently am doing so).

It's hard to remember all the dates of events, like exactly which day did I start/end my work as a Game Programmer at Envisage? When did I do my SAT test?

For those of us who joined W406 early, how about this: when did Weiren become our Cellgroup Leader? Was it 2007? Which month was that? 

Well? Can't remember can you? :P

Actually I can't either XD

I checked my email accounts; the first email I ever got from Weiren was Thu, Aug 16, 2007 at 12:10 AM. Hmm...

At any case, it was 2007, and how quickly 3-4 years has passed. Or slowly. Feels like we've known each other forever.

Okay I shall stop this retrospection, before I submerge myself in nostalgia. The point is, I blog to keep track of memories. I like to keep track of stuff. I'm an archivist, a scribe, whatever. Looking at data makes me feel powerful. In a couple of years time, we'll look back and see that 2011 would be indeed a year Promotion and Multiplication!

Like a Tidal Wave

TIDAL WAVE! Another Owl City song that is close to my heart!

Man, I'm might actually become a fan. I haven't been a fan of any one for a long time. Yeap, I sort of outgrown that phase for some time. Now I'm not a fan of Jay Chou, By2, Linkin Park, Snow Patrol, B.o.B. or whoever. Now I just like their songs.

Nah I can't imagine myself jumping up and down in Adam Young's concerts, running to the front to grab his hand and autograph. What a thought.

Anywho...

The chorus and the end of this song speaks of how I feel right now.. the tight struggle between courage and insecurity, joy and depression.

But playing this song through my mind makes me feel... brave.

Tidal Wave by Owl City
Chorus:
I forget the last time I felt brave
I just recall insecurity
'Cause it came down like a tidal wave
And sorrow swept over me 

Then I was given grace and love
I was blind but now I can see
'Cause I found a new hope from above
And courage swept over me 

End:
It hurts just to wake up
Whenever you're wearing thin
Alone on the outside
So tired of looking in

The end is uncertain
And I've never been so afraid
But I don't need a telescope
To see that there's hope
And that makes me feel brave

Meteor Shower

Meteor Shower by Owl City.
Adam expresses his feelings towards Jesus in this uber short song, but full of intense emotions.

This song echoes the cry of my heart.

I can finally see
That You're right there beside me

I am not my own
For I have been made new
Please don't let me go
I desperately need You

On The Ground!

LOL YOU MUST WATCH THIS VIDEO! Super funny song!
** Caution: Has some PG stuff**

Here be the lyrics!


I was walkin’ through the city streets
and a man walks up to me and hands me the latest energy drink
Run faster. Jump Higher.
Man, I’m not gonna let you poison me.

I threw it on the ground!

You must think I’m a joke!
I ain’t gonna be part of this system!
Man, pump that garbage in another man’s veins!

I go to my favorite hot dog stand
and the dude says, “you come here all the time! Here’s one for free.”
I said, “Man, what I look like, a charity case?”

I took it, and threw it on the ground!

I don’t need your handouts!
I’m an adult!
Please, you can’t buy me hot dog man!

At the farmer’s market with my so-called “girlfriend”
She hands me her cellphone, says it’s my dad.
Man, this ain’t my dad. This is a cellphone! <-- THE FUNNIEST LINE!

I threw it on the ground!

What you think I’m stupid?
I’m not a part of this system!
My dad’s not a phone! Duh!

Some poser hands me a cake at a birthday party
What you want me to do with this, eat it?

Happy birthday to the ground!
I threw the rest of the cake too!
Welcome to the real world, jackass!

So many things to throw on the ground
Like this, and this, and that. And even this.
I’m an adult!

Two Hollywood phonys trying to give me their autograph.
Ground! Nobody wants your autograph! Phonys!

Then the two phonys got up. Turns out they had a taser.
And they tased me in the butt hole.
I fell to the ground.

The phonys didn’t let up.
Tasing on my butt hole, over and over.
I was screaming and squirming
My butt hole was on fire!

The moral of this story is: you can’t trust the system!

Man! 

Minecrafting with Josiah

Minecraft is super addictive!

Despite the pixelated (or some would say 'crappy') graphics, the gameplay is awesome.

This game is without form but full of substance.

Been playing with Josiah during this Chinese New Year :)

We started out with nothing, struggling to survive monsters attacks, and collecting the basic materials (wood, coal, stone). But after playing for many hours, we formed out our home nicely, planted crops, collected lots of resources, and built a long railway, etc

So here's how our abode looks like:

Outside our house.

That huge green mass is what we call the "World Tree".
To the right you can say a line of grey stuff, which is our railway track.

Inside our house
Fireplace in the center!

Our house is carved into a stony cliff lawl.

another view of our house 

 Railway in our house!

You can't imagine how much effort I put into building this railway.
It leads all the way to this huge cave, teeming with resources and monsters. The reason I built it was because it was quite a long walk from our house. The whole project consumed ALOT of iron, like about 60-70 Iron Ingots, all of which were legitimately mined (yes, you can cheat in the game).

But riding the cart is much fun! It's like a roller coaster ride :)

 Riding the railway system on a minecart

Riding pass the landscape

That's the World Tree in the background, a little to the left of the center.

This is our wheat farm.

Because of our wheat farm, we have tonnes of bread! Bread restores health, so it's awesome to have an inexhaustible supply of healing.

This is an ordinary tree. It's kinda dark; hope you can make it out.

Compare it with this:

The massive world tree :D

The trunk of the world tree is 9x9 tiles large, unlike the ordinary 1x1 trees.
Atop our house, is a vast expanse of sand. Here we made a cactus farm.

Cactus farm on top of our house.

It you're wondering whats that burning structure with green stuff surrounding it, it's the way down to our house. We surrounded it cactus and fire to guard ourselves against monsters that appear in the night.

Yeap, Minecraft rocks. And it's too addictive!
It's totally worth my $27.

Well that's it, hope you guys had a wonderful Chinese New Year :)

Minecraft, Music and Madness

Woot I just bought Minecraft yesterday!

Over the past few days. I have been playing Minecraft with Bryan, but I've been shamelessly using his girlfriend's account. Then, a surge of manhood sprung up within me, and I decided to do the right thing. I typed those 16 digits in, and within an instant, $26.96 departed from me. I silently (and embarrassingly) recount that this is the 1st time I spent money on a game in about 11 years.

So what in Arthas' Flowing White Mane is Minecraft???
A Blizzard game about mining???

Not at all, my speculative friend! What do you do in Minecraft? You

Haha nah it's more than that.

Minecraft is an adventure game, where you forge your own world, literally.

Don't let the shoddy, pixelated graphics fool you - there's real substance underneath that form.

To explain in layman terms, it's like creating a world with Lego, except that you are a person roaming in and building that world. Unfortunately, you'll most likely be lost at what to do without a friend to teach you the basics :P

Bryan and I had many adventures, such as building a cosy wooden cottage with a tall lookout tower, which had a waterfall flowing down from the top of the tower. We dug a nice pond, and we grew crops. Sadly, Bryan burned down the house in a failed attempt to create a fireplace. I went into the house to observe the carnage. Needless to say, both of us were incinerated alive XD

But thank God for the word "respawn".

The burning remnants of our house.

That's our waterfall, which kinda flooded the house after it burnt down.

We dug out elaborate mining shafts, battled the undead, crafted armor and equipment, built a glass tower that was founded upon a lake and reached to the clouds (later, we jumped off from the top into the lake). Oh yes, Bryan planted a tree on top of a tree on top of a tree on top of a tree on top of a tree on top of... uh you get the idea. Well maybe you don't.

The glass tower and a tree on a tree.

Bryan later extended both the tower and the "world tree" to the heavens.

You can build really cool stuff, like this beautiful hall I found online:

It's a great game, if you enjoy building worlds and playing games like Island Troll Tribes.

---

After some introspection, I realize that the main reason I wanna get a bass guitar is to compose songs - adding the bass parts to songs. But that would mean I'll need music software and recording equipment. And I'm not very into composing songs yet, it's just something I want to do as another hobby someday. Thus, I declare that getting a Bass Guitar will be of lower priority.

And that adds to the list of stuff I wanna do as hobbies:

- Music Composing

- Learn Bass Guitar

- Learn Piano

- Story Writing

I wouldn't consider playing games as a hobby I guess. More like a jumbled up combo of play and work.

Actually there's another thing I would like to do. Make awesomely cool and stupid T-shirt prints. For fun.

Oh yes, I was walking about Nex with Yufen and Joanne, looking for an ATM, when I suddenly stepped on something squishy. I was like crap... it's bound to be chewing gum or something.

Well it turned out to be something totally unexpected:

Wait... is that Sushi?!

Inconceivable!

Anyway, I won't be updating my blog as often as before. Gotta focus on more important things. So yeah, so sad. T.T cry me a river.

Peace out.